Paul was the little boy who wandered among the trees on the Christmas Tree lot calling out "brothers, brothers..." instead of screaming for his mother. It is hard to recapture those days, but it has been fun to try. I have tried to pick out small things about Paul's childhood. In this chapter I have used excerpts from my letters to Charles when he was in Germany in l962-63, from letters to Bill in Austria (l964-65) and letters to Charles in Bordeaux (1965-66) and in Korea (1967-69). I felt grateful to them for saving the letters and for letting me use them.

Paul's entrance into our family was a landmark experience for all of us. There was the initial scene at the dinner table when we announced to his four older brothers that their mother was expecting a baby. Charles, aged 15, snorted, "Oh no...". Tim acted relatively detached. Bill mustered some enthusiasm, and David (11) immediately jumped up and practically whooped, "I won't be the youngest any more!" Then they all became enthusiastic, talking animatedly about how it would change our family. Bob and I gave them a good pitch on what fun it would be, and they were really becoming excited, when suddenly one of them said, "But what if it's a girl?" Nothing had been mentioned about the possible sex of the baby. It was as if a stone had been dropped on the souffle. Temporary gloom and apprehension enveloped them while Bob and I looked at each other and chuckled.

Fortunately I was extraordinarily healthy while I was pregnant, and I continued substitute teaching through the end of June. The church gave me a lavish shower -- I think I had about 130 thank-yous to write. They also redecorated the "middle room" at the parsonage mostly in pink (Dorothy Jenson warned them that "Carol wouldn't like it"). And there was never a child who was more heralded with love and joy than the dear little boy who arrived on November 14th, 1960 at about 9 a.m. Bob made a special trip to each of the boys' schools to tell them the good news. The older boys were absolutely wonderful about rallying around. When I look at the movies of that era I am reminded of how unfailingly gentle and concerned and sensible they were. I had admonished them about how they mustn't treat the new baby like a toy for their own pleasure. They must think of what was good for him, etc., etc. Sometimes, if they thought that I was breaking my own rules they were quick to tell me

Bobby came down that first week I was home. It was so precious for her to be there--the only time she was with me with a brand new baby. I was 44. Bobby thought she had undergone extra stress by having a baby at 39 and she warned me that I might not have the resilience and oomph that I did when I was younger. But what a dimension of love it gave to our family. I felt that as the boys progressed through their teens, they knew in a more mature way than many of their contemporaries, what "love" really meant in terms of being able to love a little brother in a totally unselfish way.

When Charles announced that he was interested in becoming an exchange student his senior year, Bob and I said that would be nice but we probably couldn't afford it and besides Marjorie Schumacher would have precedence over him. It turned out that Marjorie didn't want to go after all, but I think it was one of the first inklings I had that the boys would go "beyond" me, for it was Charles's persistence that won the day. How could I have known that he had the mind and the drive to become a linguist? I do remember trying to get him to go to bed at night when he was taking what I thought was too long over his German homework. I thought I could hurry him up by showing him how to get a translation done quickly -- take the first sensible word in the dictionary for the meaning. I remember being amazed that he was totally unwilling to settle for that but had to pursue all the variety and shades of the word (that didn't help his homework at all but showed a quality of mind that was special.) Maja volunteered to put up the extra money that would be required for the exchange. How excited we were when we had a phone call saying that the exchange student who was to come to us would be a girl! In a matter of minutes my mind had rearranged the rooms and furniture, even while I was recovering from astonishment. Then it turned out that the counselor who had received the information had misinterpreted the description of Charles's German mother-to-be as being the student who would come to us.

Charles left by bus in June, 1962 with Stan Loar for the long trip to New York. As we waved him good-bye we did not realize that it was the end of "our family" as a unit. We gave 19-month old Paul a miniature greyhound bus which he treasured as it reminded him of this big event. By the time Charles would return the following summer he would be ready for the larger world of the University.

The rest of the family settled in to get ready for welcoming Wolf-Rudiger Wilke as our exchange student.

Here are some excerpts from my letters to Charles:

7/7/62, 1329 N. Douty, Hanford

..Your postcards and letters have been read and re-read

Paul is playing with that maze and the black marble. I try to get it far enough into the maze to lose it, but he gets it out in no time every time. I do hate having my children get smarter than their mother so young! Dad is at work at the church. Dave is in the living room playing chess with Jim Strickland. Bill & Tim are helping Bob Jensen dry apricots...

7/12/62 ...The Nichols invited themselves over for supper -- they brought a pot of beans, and we had some meatloaf and ice cream...

Tim and Bill moved their bed out to the back porch yesterday so they'd get more fresh air for sleeping and have more room in their room for assorted activities -- I hope not acrobatics!

Tim is in the living room listening to records and Paul is cavorting around doing funny little dances to the music--he is a true comedian...

7/25/62 Dad, Paul and I drove home from Los Angeles (while the other boys were in the Sierras). Paul is being very distracting. He is running around in his new red tennis shoes feeling delighted to be home and pulling out all his books, balls, etc. to see if they are just as good as ever. I think he is looking around for some brothers to play with too for it seems rather dull with all of you gone.

8/6/62...well, Wolfi is here and he IS a fine person just as you indicated in your wonderful letter.

We say to Paul, "Where did Charles go..." and he runs over to the globe and turns the light on while waiting for us to show him California where you took the bus, New York where you took the plane, and finally Germany...

Bridalveil Campground, 8/16/62...Paul is sitting beside me at the camping table munching graham crackers as the sun filters through the lodgepole pines. Wolfi, having finished shining his shoes, is now dusting off his trousers and sponging them by the faucet (these Germans certainly have some wonderful customs!)... Bill and Wolfi put the tent away and Paul was trying to imitate their sweeping. Bill had fashioned a broom out of pine branches, and Paul had his own little branch which he was using with a great deal of energy.

11/5/62 Paul has a new white shirt with bow tie and cuff-links. He looked so cute in Sunday School yesterday, I wished for you. He says new words every day although you can't always tell what he is talking about. It seems hard to believe he will be TWO a week from Wednesday. We sold the trailer and he misses that. He goes around saying, "Where shu-shu?" I don't know how he got that name for it.

(The letters are full of the Cuban missile crisis, concern about Charles' future schooling and clothes and school gossip. Often I was writing from the high school where I would be teaching as a substitute.)

11/20/62 Paul gets nicer every day. His birthday was hilarious -- he loved his cake and candles and seemed to quickly understand that this was "his" day. The other boys had pooled their funds to buy him a plastic car (big enough for him to ride), but when the package was opened the parts all fell out in a heap and they had to assemble all the pieces. Paul didn't mind at all but kept collecting little piles of nuts and screws and bolts. Later Tim and Bill equipped it with a seat belt "because it's dangerous at the speeds we push him!"

Paul enjoys reading more every day and it is a pleasure to go through several books at a sitting with him. His latest favorite is an ABC's by Phyllis McGinley...

12/14/62 Christmas seems very close as I sit in the living room with David listening to Harry Belafonte singing Christmas Carols. The creche and the tree are both in place and the house looks very pretty...I taught Girls' P.E. today...in a few minutes Dad will be bringing Paul home from the Bairs. Tim is sleeping on the back porch. He had to come home from school this noon because of a bad cold and temperature. Wolfi is at Drivers' Training and I forget where Bill went. Your comments on school, etc. are fascinating and I loved being reminded of "Bill's Christmas Carol" and thinking of you riding to school and singing it to yourself. Love is such a wonderful thing and Christmas always makes me feel what the world might be like if we all felt the warm glow of it all the time. Don't forget that Dad and I still love you the way we love Paul, but with all the added richness of joy in seeing you grow into maturity. I'll probably shed a tear before Christmas is over, just thinking about you, but it will be a joyous tear...missing you fiercely and yet not ever wishing it otherwise!

1/7/63 ...dear funny little Paul runs to the globe with his bus where we have shown him "Germany". When he sees either a bus or a globe he says, "Char, Char!"

1/28/63...I hope the news will be better before I seal the letter: Walter Perry is missing on an Explorer "snow" trip. It is a very hard ordeal for everyone. Ten boys from the explorer post including Tim, Bill, Lester, Leonard, Hal Bopp, Walter Perry, Jim Rader and Ronnie Johnson left with two leaders (Earl Johnson and Bob Jenson) at 5 a.m. Saturday to camp up above Huntington Lake, near Coyote Lake. They hiked in from the road 7 miles. Walter wandered away from camp about 4 p.m. They all searched until it was so dark that there was danger of the other boys getting lost, then bedded down for a sleepless night (6 degrees temp.). Next morning everyone hiked out to get help except Tim, Ronnie J., Mr. J. & Dr. J. who searched all day. Bill came home last night feeling pretty woe-begone. They are still searching today (that means 2 nights he has been out without a sleeping bag, though he was said to be dressed warmly.) Tim, Lester, Leonard and Hal Bopp have stayed up with the search party, but they may be sent home today. You can imagine we all feel pretty distressed and of course the fact that Walter was notoriously irresponsible doesn't help. (Walter WAS found.)

1/29/63 Dearest Bobby, (she forwarded this letter to Charles)

As always, when you are near the center of a news story, you find the news woefully misrepresented. The lost boy episode has been a very traumatic experience for one and all. The news was carried on several San Francisco broadcasts (in fact Bill's name was mentioned this morning as having accompanied Walter part way -- this was absolutely untrue -- Walter merely told Bill he was going to get some wood. We are not at all sure that this strange boy did not intentionally let himself get lost -- there are several theories, but ALL teachers and leaders who have known him are unanimous in feeling he is quite capable of such an awful thing. Actually he cruelly endangered the lives of the rest of the party, and we all feel disgusted that he doesn't seem to comprehend what he did.

Anyway, Tim and his 4 companions were the heroes who found him (NOT the Sheriff's posse, as the San Francisco papers reported). The people who suffered most were the leaders I suppose because the other boys learned a searing lesson they'll never forget even if it seems like a hard experience. They faced

a real emergency and handled themselves like men -- they had courage and guts throughout. They all have a new respect for the Sierras!

Gosh, you should have seen those boys when they got home. Bill looked worse than Tim because when he arrived everyone was feeling half sure Walter was dead. Tim was wind-burned, but had not suffered any permanent harm and was full of indignation and talk. He said when they found Walter they went wild with joy, but as his story came out they all became suspicious, and the fact that Walter didn't seem to even appreciate being found, nor the things they did to help him, did not help their attitude. By the time they got him back to camp Walter was all full of his own importance...

(Much in the letters about books and art, the Earl Lectures (Tillich, Bainton, Soper), etc. Also taking Wolfi to Los Angeles, etc., etc.)

4/19/63 Happy birthday! I wish that we could all be there to celebrate it, especially Paul who enjoyed my birthday so much that I'm sure he would be ALL set for yours. He really got the idea of its being MY birthday and not his, and went around muttering "happy birday momma". He also climbed up and polished off a good portion of the cake (that Dad and the boys had had decorated) while I was at the library last night. The roses are in full bloom...the boys haven't been so ambitious with their garden, but some of the potatoes came up from last year and also some of the strawberries. Now they have planted two kinds of melons.

Signs of spring: l. Paul has some mosquito bites.

2 the lawn needs mowing

3. everyone needs new shoes, socks, etc., etc.

4. mockingbirds are ubiquitous

5. I feel lazy

6. Tim listens to ball games

- Bill finished his transistor radio (after returning it to the factory)

- Wolfi went to Death Valley

- Tim was chosen to attend Boys' State and elected President of MYF

- Wolfi got a kick out of Paul calling him "My Wolfi" and also calling him "Wolfi DeWolf".

- Bill elected Treasurer of the Sophomore Class

6/6/63 Just a note but SO MUCH to tell you. First you were awarded a $100 scholarship in the Senior Awards Assembly

Second - We ARE moving - to Hayward (about 25 miles from U.C. on June 19th...It's a good move for dad and I pray it will be for all of us...The church has about twice the membership of Hanford. Part of the reason we are being asked to go there is that their minister is getting a divorce--and they want a minister with strong family ties!!! Believe me the wonderful reputation you kids all have is a BIG help. Of course we're all excited. They say the house is nice - probably more modern.

6/26/63 22559 5th St.

Hayward, Ca.

It seems so funny to be living in a house that you have never seen. Bill and David have had more than their share of unpacking since Tim is at Boys' State and Wolfi at AYTC...We all like the yard and the climate of course.

7/3/63 ...We plan to take the Southern Pacific train to Washington on July 15th. We have to get Roger to Howard University on July 27th, then to see Dick & Jean in Boston, and on to Aunt Molly's where we'll be until we pick you up in New York.

It had been a special year in several ways. One of the big experiences for me was realizing that Wolf-Rudiger could really learn to love our family - I had had deep anxieties before he came and he really added a new dimension of love to our home. Also our horizons inevitably expanded to thinking about travel beyond our shores.

*************************

(Bill was accepted for an International Christian Youth Exchange year in Austria starting in 1964. Bobby had decided to visit on the East Coast that summer so she and Bill travelled together to New York by train. We all went down to the Berkeley station to see them off. At the last moment it was discovered that Bobby had forgotten her coat, and Bob made a wild dash with Aunt Alice to fetch it, almost missing a final farewell. It made for a tense and intense departure!)

6/16/64 22559 5th Street, Hayward, Calif.

Dear Bill,

The house has a special emptiness without you but you are still very much here in spirit. Paul (2 1/2) said, "Bill forgot something...Bill forgot something...the puppy dog...the dog for Manfred..." I reassured him that you had NOT forgotten the one I stepped on. Funny little Paul -- so full of love for you. I know he will miss you and cannot quite understand why you should be gone so long....

Dave & Charles have gone to play tennis; Dad is making a hospital call; Tim is watching Combat; Paul is up in bed (having just decided he "needed" to go to sleep in my bed instead of HIS bed...

Charles and I had a good discussion over the dishes tonight. He admires you so much but doesn't seem to feel jealous of you. He is very self-understanding...I find it especially fun to talk to him when he is in an analytical mood. I wish you could have heard some of his comments. He feels you have such a wonderful and unique time ahead.

6/23/64

Dear Bill,

Wonderful to talk to you Sunday. Your letter and postcard arrived...Paul got the Baseball postcard today...he carried it everywhere with him for a while but by today he has found one or two other things...

First you want to hear about Tim's broken ankle. He cracked the main bone in his ankle and generally "racked up" his whole leg--his hip and knee seem to bother him still, but they are not basically injured. Anyway he hobbles around with his crutches and doesn't seem to be in nearly as much pain as he was the first couple of days. DEAR Bob Tanner. He lent the skate board to Tim and as he was writhing in agony on the concrete, Bob hollers at him, "Oh I forgot to tell you not to do (whatever it was) going downhill..." And then while he was doubled up in the car, still white with pain, Bob leans cheerily on the window frame and remarks, "Now, Tim, you be sure to get back on a skate board the minute you're okay...otherwise you'll lose your nerve..." Well, as I say, DEAR Bob Tanner. I don't know how you can get along without him for a year! Tim has been a very good sport...but it is sort of tough to have his summer messed up...

7/2/64

Dear Bill,

I've been thinking of you today assuming you were on your way back to Leonia from Newton Centre.

Dave is at Pitmans right now. He and Charles finished the window-washing job at the church and Charles also helped Harry scrub down the stains on the sanctuary walls. Tomorrow Charles has to go to work at BBB for 3 days. He and Tim are discovering whether they will make good roommates or not...you know Charles thinks Tim could have higher taste in music and Tim gets sick of Charles keeping the light on...However...if they can stand each other at home where Tim is pretty closely confined with his cast, etc., they certainly ought to be able to make it at Cal.

This morning Charles and I were trying to burn up trash in the back yard -- Laura Shugar stopped by to show Paul how to feed a baby -- she brought her granddaughter who is very cunning, and it was fun to watch. Paul fed her one bite, but he was overcome by the process. He opened HIS mouth so wide trying to get her to open hers that I wished we'd had a movie.

Tim, Chet and George played for the MYF parents'night and it was a blast (I think). Phyllis played Beethoven and Chopin and Tim and George played for the folk music and then the combo really let loose...Tim gave a little spiel on what rock and roll is and then they illustrated various things and I think everyone enjoyed it. Grandma came down for the occasion and she was amazed.

7/28/64

Dear Bill,

We were supposed to leave for Hume Lake this morning, but decided to take one more day...Don't forget how TIRED Wolfi got at first just from the strain of the new language...don't get discouraged if it seems like a big strain to you.

Tim has been very fortunate to have Dave Brown for a friend to help him in getting started in the Union and making some other contacts. It has been a real life-saver when he was crippled with his cast, etc. Yesterday he went to the Dr. to get the cast removed, and, after more x-rays, his leg has been pronounced okay. However, he still walks like a cripple because of all the stiffness...I'm sure he is more determined than ever to go on the Mt. Whitney trip and we are hoping he'll be up to it...

Paul has learned to dress himself quite well, but puts on some odd combinations. He talks about you a lot. I discovered he didn't want to go to Hume Lake and finally decided that he didn't understand that we're not going into the MIDDLE of the lake...after I explained about the tent, trees, etc., he seemed to feel much happier. If only one could know what the other person is thinking!

8/12/64

Dear Bill,

We got back from Hume Lake Tuesday and found a wonderful letter from you...Hume Lake turned out to be a jolly experience, especially for the boys, for they had some wild times with Uncle Dick and the crazy leaky raft--about 50 people gathered around the beach just to watch them launch it. Dick had to take it down to the village to pump it up with a vacuum cleaner, but there were so many leaks that even after patching, Donnie had to spend the whole trip pumping with a bicycle pump to keep it from sinking. About 10 or 11 climbed aboard including Dick & Hallie's crowd and our kids, and Dick made it all very comical.

Tim and Charles swam the width of the lake several times and were determined to swim the length before they came home, but the last day Tim felt rather punk, so they gave it up (I was glad because David would have had to row for them and I didn't think he represented an adequate safety factor.)

Paul just loved the wild times at Hume Lake and all his wild cousi cousins. He would say verj firmly that he was NOT going "snimming" (swimming), and then pretty soon he would just find himself irresistibly paddling in the water and having a fine time. He learned to play 'Go Fish' with Janet and really knows the numbers better than she does.

Paul just came in. He said, "I'm hongry...Did they left? (meaning Coe and Beth)..I'm hongry. I want some lunch. . .Right NOW...ahhan han...' Mom: I'm writing to Bill. Paul: Let's not write it right now. Mom: Why not? Paul: Because I want some lunch RIGHT NOW. (pause) What do you want to say to Bill? Mom: What do YOU want to say? Paul: (holding his arms wide) I love him a big much...that's plenty - don 't type any more.

8/21/64... Tim's ankle is doing well and he is determined to go on the Sierra trip next week. He played his guitar a little and it always sounds great...

Paul is talking lots better than when you last saw him. He had a fine time turning on the hose and filling the little plastic sandbox, or pool, then running and jumping into it with a grand splash...He invited Bobby to play "Fish"-- he deals very well. But it is fun to see him try to shuffle the cards. He divides them into two piles and holds the piles against his chest; then thumbs each pile in a fine splutter with NO connection between the two halves. Then he's well content, puts them together again and deals. He is so earnest about it, and insists on doing the shuffling himself. It is hard not to let him see us laugh.

8/22/64 Dear Bill, I'm up early before the rest of the family -- tomorrow will be David's birthday but...he's at Monte Toyon for Youth Leadership Training Camp, so we won't celebrate together until he gets home.. . Yes, Charles is going with Tim on the HIKE.. . Your postcard showing the two peaks you were about to climb seemed very exciting. Now I am ver,' anxious to hear how it all went, and how climbing in the Alps compares with the Sierras.

Paul is so cute about missing you. The other night he said very flatly, "I would like BILL to give me my bath." And he plays the back yard is "Austria" or sometimes it's the living room, and he takes trips to "Austria", etc.... We took Paul to the zoo on Tuesday and he had a marvelous time. He loved turning the key in all the talky places and this time he could reach them very handily... Unfortunately he left the key at the Gorillas and in his nice innocent way assumed it would be there when he got back.

9111/64 Dear Bill, I'm sitting on the chaise in the back yard noticing how much more energetically the dandelions grow than the grass. And I'm thinking about YOU. Here comes Paul with his viewmaster, explaining how it works to me. He is full of talking and learning. I said to him, 'When Bill comes home he will give you a hug . . ." Paul said, "And I will give him a big hug too." Now he is being a bird flying across the grass.

Dad took Charles and Tim over to Cal early this morning.. . Tim had to have his physical and Charles was going to look into a library job. Tim has a prospect of a job with a combo called, The Versatile Latins'; and on the strength of that he has bought a new amplifier which he hopes to pay off in a few months.

They (Charles and Tim) will write you about their trip. Most of what I can write would be emotions -- how anxious I felt the Monday and Tuesday we had stormy weather here and the weather report said, 'Snow in the Sierras at the 6000 foot level" -- knowing they were at 11,000 feet! As usual I am bursting with pride that they used good sense and had a good trip with the one major disappointment of not climbing Whitney itself. But they had to dig in to protect themselves from the storm instead... Tim had some rough days physically (he must have had some flu bug) and some awful blisters on his feet--his ankle still bothers him; and Charles had a terrible headache for a couple of days after he came home (altitude change?)... You can imagine how excited we were to meet them! They're already talking about next summer.

Meanwhile David had a ball at the Leadership Camp and some good experiences at Music Camp...Now he's back at school.

9/28/64 . ..Dear Bill, Dad and I went up to the District Meeting at White Sulphur Springs last Monday and Tuesday. ..about ten miles from some of the worst forest fires of the season...we 're hoping for some good ocean air... I think of you at every turn. It seems strange to have David and Paul be the only boys home. But things are going very well . . . we all enjoy talking about you and reading your letters. Paul said importantly, "I think I'll write Bill a letter." "What will you say... " says I. Paul: "Dear Bill... Thank you that I love you so much...Love, Paul." "But," he added thoughtfully, "I don't know how to spell 'dear'"... So I wrote D E A R for him and he had a fine time writing a letter to you -- I'll try to enclose it.

This is a story he told me sitting on my lap at breakfast: "Once upon a time there was a lion and he went to see the football guys in San Francisco. And they runned and runned and they fell down (pause) tackled. And the zebra seed the baseball guys...and his mother took him. You know why his mother went with him? He might get lonesome at the baseball guys. And his brother let him play. And then he did a home run and ran around and ran around and that's the end of the story..." The other day I asked him, "What are you going to be when you grow up?" And he said, "I'm going to be a brother..."(and then after a pause, thoughtfully), "I'm a little brother NOW,,,"

10/11/64 Hi Bill! Sunday night. Dad and I just finished doing the dishes...David stayed home from MYF...another mean cold... Later ...I'm sitting in the kitchen in the middle of the morning. Paul is still in his pajamas and I am trying to persuade him to surprise me by going to get his clothes on. The teakettle just reminded me to get a cup of coffee...from where I sit (in Dad's place) I can see our Christmas tree which is really especially beautiful this year: the Broughers got it for us, making a special trip to the mountains to get their own and ours.

It is a fir tree, but especially even and open, so the ornaments hang down prettily. It stands in the center window and we have the curtains open just enough to have it seen from the street. We moved the long brown davenport in front of the fireplace and it looks surprisingly well -- we might even leave it that way. Dad got some lights for the juniper tree outdoors so we look a llttle more gay from the street.

Paul has loved helping set up the creche and trimming the tree and has done surprisingly well. I'm sure it's easy to idealize each other when we are far away. Paul isn't always an angel and he was pestering me just now about the typewriter. He's full of the excitement of Christmas and he exerts more of his own wilt as he gets older. I guess the real test of love is to love a person for himseff including his best and his worst. . .

I've had a horrible cold in my chest and Dad finally MADE me go to the doctor so I've been on penicillin. .. David is pretty busy with his library job...getting a lot of satisfaction out of making money...he is passionately determined to buy some sort of stereo now that he has his bike. Dad and I tiy to convince him that there may be something else he'll want instead before long...

12/30/64 Dear Bill, Where to begin! First your WONDERFUL packages. Bobby and Maja just loved the beautiful candles.. .the beautiful Stille Nacht candle will last a lifetime, for surely we could never burn it. Incidentally, everything came in perfect condition -- which brings me to the tasse - you couldn't have picked a more perfect gift for me...the most beautiful one 1 have ever seen...Paul looks so cute in the Kinderhutte and I think Dad got a movie of him in it. You just have no idea how much that funny little four year old talks about you and loves you.

He says such special things about you that it's hard to remember... We got a calendar in the mail that took his fancy and he decided he wanted it nailed up in his room. I kept putting him off. So one morning he came in holding it and said verp' firmly, "Mom, TELL Dad to put this up in my room with a nail..." I said, "Paul, I don't TELL Dad to do things; I ASK Daddy.. " Paul thought a minute and then said, "Well ask Daddy to put this up in my room...and TELL HIM RIGHT NOW." Paul's BIG present for Christmas was a set of drums. They're not real of course, but they are fancier than the old set and he just adores them. He loves to play with Tim and we all enjoy their "jam sessions".

When we went to get our Christmas tree at one of the outdoor lot where you cut your own, Paul got lost among the little trees. Not being able to see other the tops of the trees, he waniered through them, calling out, "Brothers! Brothers!" Paul loved to pretend he was a dog. He would climb into bed with me first thing in the morning and bark a greeting and then make dog-like noises and nuzzlings. I would get tired of the game before he did, and I'd say, "Please Paul, don't be a dog any more, be a BOY." But the answer would be, "Arf, arf." He would come to the back door and bark to be let in just like Taffy. He was excellent at pretending other animals and seemed to have a flair for imitating and a lot of grace in cavorting around, as well as a very true voice. Another game Paul loved was "imaginary baseball". He could make you feel as if the ball and bat were very real by his exquisite imitation of every nuance of batting, reaching high in the air for a wild pitch, etc., etc.

6/28/65 Dear Bill,... We loved the pictures of you. I had them in my purse in church and as I reached in to get out my offering, I took them out to steal a look. Dave was sitting next to me so he took them from me. Tim was sitting next to Dave so he took them from Dave. Judi was sitting next so she took them from Tim. Then the offering plate came along, so Tim just placed them piously in the plate and passed it on to me, and I had to fish them out while Ham,' Lindley was chuckling in the next pew...Same old Tim.

Tim has a job! Working in the Invertebrate Pathology Dept. of U. C. at Albany. He started Friday. It will last until Sept. 3 and he has to feed worms, and a lot of other things. He should learn a lot.

9/16/65 Dear Charles,

Bill showed slides of the hike. (they had just hiked 80 miles up over Mt. Whitney.) Word has just come that the Countess is coming by plane on Sept. 19 to stay until about the 5th of October. So we are really excited. Maja got overnight reservations at Yosemite Lodge for Sept. 27th among other things. Paul started to kindergarten Monday. He is beginning the toughening up process that gradually converts innocent young minds into boyhood.. .it's time for me to go to meet him now...

10/28/65... the news of Viet Nam. ... I wonder what your thoughts are. There are some disturbing aspects to me in the tendency for Left and Right to clash (like the marchers tangling with the Hells Angels) instead of sober facing up to the facts of our foreign policy... Dad and I watched a Telstar question-answer type town meeting with Eisenhower, Goldberg and Marshall answering questions posed by students in London, Paris, Rome and Mexico City -- some of the questions were pretty hostile about Viet Nam. I would like to have seen it with you. Maja said that two men came to see her from the army to be sure you had left the U.S. when you said you had. They were just checking.

I'm really behind on everything else -- I feel it's hard on Paul to have to go to Broughers every day while 1 do substitute teaching at the high school... Dad has been preaching an extra good series on the Apostles' Creed...

11/12/65 1 feel many changes are taking place in American thinking re demonstrations, Pacifists, "extremists", and in a way I wish you could have had this year both in America and France to get a more complete perspective. David is at the "Governor's Conference" as a discussion leader... I'm still a "social studies" teacher at Tennyson High School. Paul's birthday is on Sunday. Dick & Hallie are coming with their kids primarily because Maja got a new car and is giving them the Rambler which we have temporarily...Paul is counting the days. He says he's going to share everything he gets with Donnie, Bobby and Janet and he "hopes they don't break anything -- but they'll be careful..."

12/1/65 Paul is going to have his tonsils out next week. He has been getting quite deaf and the doctor says there is an obstruction in the Eustachian tube caused by enlarged tonsils. The same thing happened to me when I was about his age (because of deafness), and apparently the operation should clear that up. It's hard to explain to a little guy.. .and I'll be glad when it's over.

12/16/65 Grandma had an operation for a cataract on her right eye last Friday and is due to go home today. ..she must be careful for a while ... Paul is getting along fine after his tonsillectomy though he was pretty miserable at first... 1/2/66 Happy New Year Lovely holidays with Molly and Paul Boerner -- they are seriously planning to move out here, so a good deal of time went into helping them get appointments re jobs and living accommodations.

3/15/66

Paul's latest favorite ice-cream is "Choco-mint squirrel" (Borden's Choco-mint swirl).

3/29/66... Tim, Bill and Dave had a terrific (??) ski trip to Squaw Valley. They left about 5 a.m. and came home at 9 p.m. looking like boiled lobsters, and limping like refugees from a disaster. Even Bill had taken one horrible spill and Tim and Dave had several. Anyway they survived.

The next crisis is a "Roaring Twenties" Dance to be put on by the MYF Friday night. Bill has justifiable gleeps because, as president of the MYF, he is responsible, but several other church groups are invited, and it could turn out to be (I) a brawl; (2) a disaster; (3) a flop. Right now he is just hoping it will be OVER.

5/27/66... Bobby had a minor operation two days ago. She is doing well. Maja seems tired and older but insists she is okay. Molly and Paul have bought a house in Oakland... Dave was just elected Student Body President at Hayward High and Bill has lined up a summer job at the Lowie Museum... Paul is full of kindergarten and learning to read.. Tim's hair isn't quite down to his shoulders... 6/8/66. ..Reagan's winning the primary (for governor) by a landslide is very depressing...But we'll recover.

(That summer was highlighted by Bill's graduation from high school and preparation for the University, and Charles's rather traumatic return from Bordeaux. He became II, stranded and in need of money to pay for the extra fare required since he had missed the student flight. )

- Quotations from Paul at age 5 1/2: "I'm the youngest one of my whole friends..." Paul: I know what makes drops... (raindrops)" Mom: "What?' Paul: "If the drops come out faster than each other it makes pouring water... but if they come very slowly then it makes drops." - Paul wanted a kitten and I finally relented: Paul: "There's only one problem. What would we name it? If it's furry, we could name it "Furry". Paul: "This time I had a little discussion with the cat. I told him where his house was, and I told him to stay in his house and have a rest." (After we moved to Millbrae the cat became very much of a wandering Tom. A handsome beast, but Paul lost interest, and the cat would not stay home. Also I had a personality clash with Frisky since we never agreed as to who was allowed to walk on my kitchen counters. Finally a kind veterinarian offered to take it off our hands. (I had mingled emotions when we learned that on the first day with his new owner Frisky managed to swallow their pet parakeet).